Keeping the spark alive

​Relationships have a lot of spark in their beginnings, and most of us love falling in love. 

And then. Something. Happens. 

Suddenly the you-are-so-cute-I-even-love-your-farts phase makes way for the I'm-going-to-duct-tape-your-butt-shut-if-you-fart-one-more-time phase. 

If you think I'm being ridiculous, think about a new baby and how cute everything they do is, then think about that same baby as a teenager, and you don't think it's cute anymore. 

Am I right?

I can't tell you how to handle delicate situations such as these, but I can help you rekindle the memory of the love you have for them, even when you feel angry at them. 

This might sound crazy, but the answer is to cultivate gratitude for them, even in the midst of irritation. 

I had a past relationship that used to trigger the heck out of me, but I wanted to be in the relationship. I created a gratitude journal just for this relationship. 

Whenever I would get mad enough to spit nails, I would retreat to my room with my journal, and I would write down reasons why I was grateful for this person until I actually was. I wouldn't stop until I had tears of grateful joy flowing down my face. And it didn't take long, either! 

I would never repeat reasons, and the first entries each time would feel forced - and they were - but I would keep going. I kept digging deeper and deeper until I felt overwhelmed with love. 

The thing that makes you mad might still be an issue, but it's a whole lot easier to talk about it and work it out with an open heart full of love.